The Fall Nationals in Boston are still going on
as I write this, but Janice "Moogal" Kofman and I
had to leave this Tuesday, November 23rd, in order 
to get back to our "real" lives. :)

    Boston is a beautiful city, although Janice 
will have to take our word for it.  With all of
the excitement going on in the tourneys, she never
made it out of the hotel!

     While my much better half, Denise, was enjoying
the sights of the city, I played 11 sessions in total
over 4 days, splitting time between Janice and my
regular Winnipeg partner, Bill "Wintaka" Treble.  The
first thing we learned about the host city is that 
one simply does NOT drive in Boston.  The streets being
in poor repair is the least of one's problems.  It
seems that a group of urban terrorists called the
"Big Dig" has ripped apart the city, stopping the
flow of traffic, communications and water at the
very heart of the city.  Even without this, though, the
streets only go about 3 blocks each before disappearing.
Directions to any destination will make brain surgery
sound like tic-tac-toe.  No street has more than two
lanes, and there are always two lanes of parked cars.
This leads to an obvious question:  where does one
DRIVE?  Again, the answer is:  one does NOT drive in
Boston!  And then there is the traffic.  Apparently,
"right of way" is the sole concern of lawyers;  drivers
go wherever they want and whenever they want.  In
addition to these transportation problems, we had to
deal with the distance between the Holiday Inn, where
we were staying, and the playing site.  The ACBL web 
page stated that this was a "20 minute walk".  Wrong.  
It was a 20 minute FLIGHT, maybe.  After all, Sommerville
is TWO FULL CITIES away from Boston, with Cambridge
nestled in between them.

    The tournament was played in two adjoining hotels,
the Marriot and Westin.  Climbing up stairs, ramps and
escalators and then negotiating the floors and connecting
walkways was a simple matter...for anyone with a Sherpa
guide!  Some actually needed "assisted living" dogs to
get around.  Myself, I could have used a St. Bernard 
with a neck barrel of cognac.  The lighting was so bad
in some rooms that even the sighted players needed 
seeing eye dogs.  Braille cards might have been in order.

    The only other complaint that people had was with
the directing.  We, for example, were told by various
directors that:

1.  We may NOT warn opponents that we psyche somewhat
    more often than Alvin Roth and Tobias Stone.

2.  Failure to alert carries NO penalty, even if it
    causes us to double a part score into game.

3.  We are NOT permitted to draw inferences from
    opponents bids.

4.  Opponents' convention cards do NOT have to match.

5.  A TD, upon being shown the rule book contradicting
    hir ruling, should NOT feel obliged to change the
    incorrect decision.

6.  North-South pairs are solely responsible for slow
    play, even if the East-West pairs arrive ten minutes
    late for a 15-minute round.

    Needless to say, ALL of the above actions by TD's
in Boston were quite wrong.  I can only thank these 
Directors for enhancing my appreciation of the fine 
work that Tuna does on OKBridge. :)

    All complaints aside, though, Boston was the best
National that I have ever attended.  It was great 
meeting two of my fellow Fireside Commentators, BridgBoy
and LBrown, for the first time.  It was also wonderful
meeting so many of the Firesider attendees.  I don't
dare try to list them all for you;  with my memory, I'm 
sure that I would forget someone. :(

     It was a successful tournament for my partners
and me.  Moogal came second TWICE with Hughie in novice
events, while Billy and I came a respectable 60th in
the Open Pairs--which, for us, is MUCH better than it
sounds. :)

     After putting together some very nice scores but
NOT finishing in the overalls, Janice and I finally
got our act together on the last morning, just before
flying home.  Despite two horrendous bids and a misclaim
by yours truly, we finished FIRST in the B Section and
FOURTH overall!  Well done, Janice!

     Here is a sample hand from the winning effort:

  JANICE:  S- AJ1064   H- 542  D- Q1082  C- 2

     With them vulnerable at MPs, Jan's Partner opens 
1C in 2nd seat.  1S by Janice.  2H by Partner, 2S by 
Janice.  Partner rebids 2NT, inviting 3NT.  Do you 
accept?

     The question might be reworded to:  Could your 
hand be any WORSE here?  Answer:  Yes!  We might have
5 HCPs and some distribution for our bidding, and we
might not have held such good spots in the pointed 
suits.  While the C-x is a liability and MPs does not
reward stretching for thin games, Janice bid on to 3NT
on the strength of her "extras".  Making 5 opposite:

  OPENER:  S- K   H- AK106  D- AJ6  C- AKJ105

     A Narvey Dummy is a dummy which is FAR stronger
than we might expect.  A true Narvey has two full
Aces more than any optimist could hope for, and does 
not make a bid.  I had the distinct pleasure of holding 
one of these:

  COLIN:  S- AJ1072  H- A94  D- 53  C- QJ7

     Partner (Bill "Wintaka" Treble) opens 1D, showing 
11-15 HCPs and 3+ Diamonds in our Canadian Club system.  
1S on my right.  Hmm, I like the sound of THIS, so I 
pass.  2H on my right.  5C by Partner!  5C, no less!  
Pass, to me.  I'd have certainly considered 6C or even 
7C, but something was "up" here.  And can 5C really be 
passed out here?  Sure enough, LHO doubled.  Pass, Pass.  
Redouble.  As it happens, I *needed* to redouble, to PUSH 
the board with so many pairs going for -800 in 5S doubled!  
Worse yet, we needed some luck just to make 5C!  Partner 
held:

 BILL:  S- void   H- void   D- AJ1074  C- K10986532

     Ho, hum.  11 tricks.  Another flat board. :)

     To keep up with the ongoing events in Boston,
check out the ACBL web site at:

     http://www.acbl.org/nabc/Boston/Boston.htm

     While I probably won't be able to attend the
Nationals next year in Cincinatti, Birmingham and
Anaheim, I am looking forward to taking part in the
Summer 2001 Nationals in Toronto, Ontario.  I hope
to see you all there!

Colin